I Tell You True
I can’t stop drinking, I tell you true
Since I watched my daughter perish
She burned to death inside a car
I lost what I most cherish
I saw the angels hold her
As I screamed with useless hope
I can’t stop drinking, I tell you true
It’s the only way I cope!
I can’t stop drinking, I tell you true
Since I found my sister dead
She hung herself to stop the rapes
I found her in the shed
The rapist bastard still lives here
Unpunished in this town
I can’t stop drinking, I tell you true
Since I cut her down.
I can’t stop drinking, I tell you true
Since my mother passed away.
They found her battered down the creek
I miss her more each day
My family blamed me for her death
Their words have made me wild
I can’t stop drinking, I tell you true
‘Cos I was just a child.
So if you see someone like me
Who’s drunk and loud and cursing
Don’t judge too hard, you never know
What sorrows we are nursing.
Circles and Squares
I was born Yankunytjatjara
My Mother is Yankunytjatjara
Her Mother was Yankunytjatjara
My Family is Yankunytjatjara
I have learnt many things from my Family Elders
I have grown to recognise that my Life travels in Circles
My Aboriginal Culture has taught me that
Universal Life is Circular
When I was born I was not allowed to live with my Family
I grew up in the white man’s world
We lived in a Square house
We picked fruit and vegetables from a neatly fenced Square plot
We kept animals in Square paddocks
We sat and ate at a Square table
We sat on Square chairs
I slept in a Square bed
I looked at myself in a Square mirror and did not know who I was
One day I met my Mother
I just knew that this meeting was part of our Healing Circle
Then I began to travel
I visited places that I had been before
But this time I sat down with Family
We gathered closely Together by big Round campfires
We ate bush tucker, feasting on Round ants and berries
We ate meat from animals that lived in Round burrows
We slept in Circles on beaches around Our fires
We sat in the dirt, on Our Land, that belongs to a big Round planet
We watched the Moon grow to a magnificent yellow Circle
That was Our Time
I have learnt two different ways now
I am thankful for this
That is part of my Life Circle
My heart is Round like a drum, ready to echo the music of my Family
But the Square within me still remains
The Square hole stops me in my entirety.
© Ali Cobby Eckermann
Grade One Primary
I’m sitting up the tree today
And I’m NOT getting down!
I don’t feel safe at school no more
Just ‘cos my skin is brown.
If I sit here overnight
Will I turn into a bird?
So I can fly away from here
And all the nasty words
‘Cos it’s no fun being different
Where do I fit in?
Some kids at school are nasty
Their words have such a sting.
You half caste dog, you coon, you boong,
You stinking bloody abo,
I don’t know what these words mean -
I know they stab me like an arrow.
I asked my teacher to explain
She just slapped me hard
Then when it was lunchtime
I was pushed over in the yard.
So now I’m sitting up the tree
I’ll hide from everyone.
I don’t understand this place -
I’m only in Grade One!
© Ali Cobby Eckermann
Ribbons
‘See you’ I said to the children
as I memorised
their Anangu faces
filled with laughter
and trust for family
innocent in their youth
and strong in culture
‘See you’ I said to the Elders
as the tears flow
in my heart
and I bend down
to shake their hands
and gain my strength
by skin
‘See you’ I said at Murputja
and the dust from my car
as I drove away
was like a ribbon
across the desert sand
tying me to that place
forever
© Ali Cobby Eckermann
Intervention Pay Day
I love my wife she right skin for me pretty one my wife young one found her at the
next community over across the hills little bit long way not far
and from there she give me good kids funny kids mine we always laughing all together
and that wife she real good mother make our wali real nice flowers and grass patch
and chickens I like staying home with my kids
and from there I build cubby house yard for the horse see I make them things from left
overs from the dump all the left overs from fixing the houses and all the left overs I
build cubby house and chicken house
and in the house we teach the kids don’t make mess go to school learn good so you can
work round here later good job good life and the government will leave you alone
and from there tjamu and nana tell them the story when the
government was worse rations government make all the rules but don’t know culture can’t sit in the sand oh tjamu and nana they got the best story we always laughing us mob
and from there night time when we all asleep all together on the grass patch dog and cat
and kids my wife and me them kids they ask really good questions about the olden days about today them real ninti them kids they gunna be right
and from there come intervention John Howard he make new rules he never even
come to see us how good we was doing already Mal Brough he come with the army
we got real frightened true thought he was gonna take the kids away just like tjamu and
nana bin tell us
I run my kids in the sand hills took my rifle up there and sat but they was all just lying
changing their words all the time wanting meeting today and meeting tomorrow we was
getting sick of looking at them so everyone put their eyes down and some even shut their ears
and from there I didn’t care too much just kept working fixing the housing being happy
working hard kids go to school wife working hard too didn’t care too much we was
right we always laughing us mob all together
but then my wife she come home crying says the money in quarantine but I didn’t know why
they do that we was happy not drinking and fighting why they do that we ask the
council to stop the drinking and protect the children hey you know me ya bloody mongrel
I don’t drink and I look after my kids I bloody fight ya you say that again hey settle
down we not saying that Mal Brough saying that don’t you watch the television he
making the rules for all the mobs every place Northern Territory he real cheeky whitefella
but he’s the boss we gotta do it
and from there I tell my wife she gets paid half half in hand half in the store her money in
the store now half and half me too all us building mob but I can’t buy tobacco or
work boots you only get the meat and bread just like the mission
days just like tjamu and nana tell us
and from there I went to the store to get meat for our supper
but the store run out only tin food left so I asked for some bullets I’ll go shoot my own meat but sorry they said you gotta buy food that night I slept hungry and I slept by myself thinking about it
and from there the government told us our job was finish the government been give us the sack
we couldn’t believe it we been working CDEP for years slow way park the truck
at the shed just waiting for something for someone with tobacco
the other men’s reckon fuck this drive to town for the grog but I stayed with my kids
started watching the television trying to laugh not to worry just to be like yesterday
and from there the politician man says I give you real job tells me to work again
but different only half time sixteen hours but I couldn’t understand it was the same job as
before but more little less pay and my kids can’t understand when they come home
from school why I cant buy the lolly for them like I used to before I didn’t want to tell
them I get less money for us now
and from there they say my wife earns too much money I gonna miss out again I’m
getting sick of it don’t worry she says I’ll look after you but I know that’s not right way
I’m getting shame my brother he shame too he goes to town drinking leaves his wife
behind leaves his kids
and from there I drive round to see tjamu he says his money in the store too poor bloke
he can’t even walk that far and I don’t smile I look at that old man he lost his smile too
but nana she cook the damper and tail she trying to smile she always like that
and from there when I get home my wife gone to town with the sister in law she gone
look for my brother he might be stupid on the grog he not used to it she gotta find him
might catch him with another woman make him bleed drag him home
and from there my wife she come back real quiet tells me she went to casino them
others took her taught her the machines she lost all the money she lost her laughing
and from there all the kids bin watching us quiet way not laughing around so we all go
swimming down the creek all the families there together we happy again
them boys we take them shooting chasing the malu in the car we real careful with the
gun not gonna hurt my kids no way
and from there my wife she sorry she back working hard save the money kids gonna
get new clothes I gonna get my tobacco and them bullets but she gone change again
getting her pay forgetting her family forget yesterday only thinking for town with the
sister in law
and my wife she got real smart now drive for miles all dressed up going to the casino with them other kungkas for the Wednesday night draw
I ready told you I love my kids I only got five two pass away already and I not
complaining bout looking after my kids no way but when my wife gets home if she spent
all the money not gonna share with me and the kids
I might hit her first time
wali – house
tjamu – grandfather
ninti – clever
malu – kangaroo
kungkas – women